


Annual Cyber Security Training

by seibelsays



Series: Fluffy Fridays [9]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Fluff Bingo 2019, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-01
Updated: 2019-11-01
Packaged: 2021-01-16 01:15:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21262694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seibelsays/pseuds/seibelsays
Summary: Darcy might die of boredom if this class goes on any longer.





	Annual Cyber Security Training

**Author's Note:**

> Guess what I had to do at work this week. It was not nearly this exciting.
> 
> Fills the prompt "Lied to get you out of trouble" for my Fluff Bingo card.

Darcy’s eyes fluttered as she struggled to stay awake. The instructor stood at the front of the room and droned on about...probably something completely obvious, while Darcy was doing everything in her power to not pull a Sleeping Beauty and pass out from the sheer boredom of it all.

But they were only in hour 3 of the 8 hour security review. No one would be kissing her awake anytime soon. Regretfully.

“Remember. You are the first line of defense against online attacks,” the instructor droned for the fifteenth time, then turned the page in his binder. He repeated the sentence at the end of every module and Darcy was pretty sure this was how brainwashing worked. 

“Module Sixteen,” he continued. “Surfing the Web.”

If Darcy didn’t get out of here soon, she was going to scream.

She never would have expected life at Avengers HQ to be so...ordinary. Oh sure, there were aliens and supervillains showing up every other week, but she’d had plenty of that chasing Jane around the globe for however many years before they finally settled into the Avengers’ labs in upstate New York, too. Add in the monotonous paperwork and she might as well have been back at her boring temp job in New Mexico that she’d briefly taken to help pay the bills between Jane and Erik’s discoveries. Someone had to keep the lights on, after all. She didn’t make with the science, so Darcy paid for the Pop Tarts. 

Honestly, the only major difference in her life these days was the whole dating a super-hot super-soldier deal she had going. Speaking of…

She looked around, but Bucky was no longer sitting with Steve at the next table over. That was odd - she hadn’t even noticed him get up. Normally, they had an eerie sense of the other’s location that she reveled in. After a moment, she rolled her eyes. Stupid super-soldiers and their stupid spy skills. Even if she could normally sense when he was around, if he didn’t want to be noticed, he wasn’t. 

At least he got a break from this maddeningly dull review. She just hoped that his sudden, silent departure was out of boredom, not because sitting in this room with a lot of other people had gotten to him. He was doing so well these days. If this nonsense review caused him a setback, she might have to have a loud word or seven with Maria Hill. 

She glanced to her left and watched as Sharon Carter paid strict attention and took dutiful notes. Because of course she did. 

“You’re a badass super spy,” Darcy whispered to her. “Isn’t this a little...basic for you?”

“Everyone should understand the basics, Darcy,” Sharon replied with a smile. “The refresher is good - it keeps us sharp.”

“When you hover over a link with your mouse, the destination URL should appear in the lower portion of your screen,” the intructionor’s monotonous voice continued.

Darcy gave Sharon a flat look. “When was the last time anyone in this building even used a computer mouse?”

Sharon cringed. “Some people might...still use them at home or something? Maybe?”

Darcy snorted. She couldn’t actually remember the last time she’d opened her personal laptop and used a mouse. Everything she needed to do these days was on her phone. Or she just asked FRIDAY. 

“You should keep your anti-virus software up to date, to protect against the most recent and sophisticated online threats,” the instructor droned, oblivious to the rest of the room. Now that Darcy thought about it, he looked about as bored as she felt.

Maybe they could commiserate later, if the class hadn’t caused Bucky a setback and they hadn’t all died of boredom. Between her and the instructor, he looked like he might be winning the race to death by brain atrophy, but Darcy was no quitter. If this stupid seminar led to Darcy’s untimely demise, her only regret would be missing Bucky’s swift and terrible revenge. She had no doubt he’d burn the world down to avenge her death. She’d do the same for him.

Hell, she’d do the same for _less than_ his death. She was seriously considering sanctions against Captain America himself for conspiring with Hill to schedule this stupid review at all, let alone on her one year anniversary.

Which was today. By the time the day was over, she was going to be mentally exhausted and in no mood to celebrate. Ugh. Life was terrible.

“It’s not _that_ bad,” Sharon whispered, interrupting Darcy’s thoughts. Sharon was sounding more and more like she was trying to convince herself as well as Darcy. “At least it’s not an HR training. Again.”

Darcy shuddered at the memory. “Still. I get why _I’m_ here. I’m a paper pusher with no specialized training and access to a lot of sensitive information. I’m a soft target. Aren’t you just a little bit insulted that you have to be here, too?”

“If I got insulted every time someone underestimated me, there wouldn’t be a man left alive in this building,” Sharon muttered darkly.

Darcy snorted again, then coughed to cover her laughter. The instructor didn’t pause or look up, although she did draw a curious look from Steve. She lifted her water bottle in a “cheers!” motion in his direction, then took an exaggerated sip. At least Steve had the decency to show up for this terrible, exhaustingly boring training. Maria Hill signed her own note excusing herself from it. Darcy envied her confidence.

“Remember. You are the first line of defense against online attacks.” The instructor flipped the page in his binder. “Passwords,” he droned on, almost without pause. “Passwords are the keys to your account.”

Steve raised his hand. “Sir?” he interrupted politely. Darcy perked up at the brief respite from the instructor’s monotonous voice.

The instructor blinked at the unexpected interruption. “Um...yes?”

“I’ve been reading ahead in the packet you gave us this morning -”

“Of course you were,” Darcy muttered, a little disappointed. Sharon snickered as Darcy slumped into her seat.

“-and I was wondering about these recommended password guidelines.” Steve gave the instructor what Darcy liked to think of as his best “gee golly gosh” smile. 

“You really go for this?” Darcy whispered to Sharon, who just gave her a shrug and a smile. 

The instructor sighed and did little to cover it. “Yes, Captain Rogers, you should use a different password for every account and your passwords should include a mix of letters and numbers.”

“But how should we remember them all? Do we write them down?”

Darcy squinted at Steve in confusion. He...he had an eidetic memory. He would never need to write a password down, no matter how complex. Unless he was just helping the class? She snuck a glance at Sharon, who continued smiling, her face giving away nothing.

Steve’s face was open and expectant as he held his pencil just above his notebook, seemingly ready to jot down whatever pearl of wisdom the instructor was about to drop.

Darcy flicked her eyes back to the instructor, who was taking a deep, cleansing breath and apparently reminding himself that he should not cuss out a centenarian, let alone one that was also considered a national icon.

“No, Captain Rogers. The most secure option would be a password safe, which we will cover shortly.”

“Ah, yes. Thank you!” Steve smiled at the instructor again.

His best war bond selling smile.

That absolute _troll_.

She would want him to continue with the absurd questions through the rest of the class, if it didn’t mean that the class would be that much longer. As it was, they were scheduled here for another...

Darcy glanced at her watch and held back a sob. They were scheduled here for another four hours. She let her head fall back and slumped down into her chair. Longest. Afternoon. Ever. If this continued, she was going to have to take drastic measures to keep from losing her mind.

The instructor cleared his throat. “Passwords are the -”

_BEEP BEEP BEEP._

The siren blaring to life over their heads caused Darcy to jolt in her seat. 

_“Attention. Fire has been detected in the building. Please make your way safely to the exit in an orderly fashion.”_

Darcy grinned a little at the sound of FRIDAY’s voice.

Freedom. Sweet, sweet freedom.

The instructor blinked, closed his binder, and left the room without a word or glance back. There was a small amount of grumbling as the others in the room gathered their things to evacuate, and then a slightly larger amount of grumbling as the mass of people heading for the door actually blocked the exit. So much for an orderly fashion. These were the _highly trained_ and _highly educated_ agents, too. She forced herself to not physically facepalm and instead glanced at Steve who was shaking his head at the inability of the agents to evacuate properly.

Darcy stood and grabbed her bag off the back of her chair and looked to Sharon, who hadn’t moved.

“That’s not the fire alarm,” Sharon said, a thoughtful look on her face.

Darcy groaned then dug through her bag for her taser. She held it up. “Fight our way out?” Why not? She’d been ready to die of boredom anyway. Bucky would avenge her. Wherever he was.

Sharon laughed lightly as she got to her feet. “Slow down, Rambo. Bucky’s been a bad influence on you.”

Darcy shrugged. “We’re a bad influence on each other, we balance nicely that way.”

Sharon grinned. “So Steve tells me.” She nodded towards the door. “Let’s get out of here.”

“What’s this about me?” Steve asked, joining them.

“Bucky’s a bad influence on Darcy,” Sharon replied, swinging her bag over her shoulder.

“Ah.” Steve gave Darcy a small smile. 

“Speaking of - where’d he run off to?” Darcy asked Steve, pointedly.

Steve flushed. “Oh well. Um. He -”

Darcy sighed and checked the charge on her taser, cranking the setting up a notch higher. She really did love the new model Tony had built for her. “Let’s go collect him from the clutches of bad guys then.”

“Darcy-”

Darcy ignored him and led the way out of the classroom, her taser ready. It was all probably a misunderstanding or had some sort of plausible explanation and was in no way part of some nefarious plot. If there wasn’t actually a fire, maybe it was a fire drill. Maybe they’d changed the wording of the alert. Maybe Tony had mucked around with FRIDAY’s code and she’d become self-aware and decided humans were the problem and was actually leading them all to their doom.

Okay, maybe not that last one. Even if it wasn’t completely out of the realm of possibility. Hell, it wouldn’t even be the _first_ time it had happened.

Darcy really needed to get out more. This place was warping her sense of reality. She’d say it was Bucky’s fault, but really, it had been this way for years before he came along. He was just a really nice bonus.

Speaking of Bucky, where _was_ he? She was starting to worry just a little - he’d been gone from the class far too long as it was, and now with this fire alarm that might not actually be a fire alarm...Well, Darcy was on high alert, that was all. She worried. Sue her.

“Darcy!” Sharon hissed from somewhere behind her. Darcy glanced over her shoulder to see Sharon and Steve lagging behind her. That was another odd thing. Normally, those two would have insisted on taking the lead in a situation like this. So much just wasn’t adding up.

Darcy halted her steps and peaked around the corner.

To find her idiot boyfriend grinning and waving at her from the other side of the hall. 

Darcy felt the grin split her face as she sprinted down the hall to get around to the other side of the glass so she could get to him. She launched herself at him, and he caught her. Every time, he caught her. He never, ever failed.

“You _didn’t_!” Darcy exclaimed, burying her face in his neck. “You did not just have FRIDAY fake a fire alarm to get us out of that stupid seminar.”

“No idea what you’re talkin’ ‘bout, Darce,” Bucky replied. She could hear the smile in his voice. His arms tightened around her and he lifted gently. She wrapped her legs around his waist and clung to him.

“Love you,” he whispered.

“Love you back.”

Darcy reluctantly unwound herself from around Bucky and he gently set her back on her feet. 

“So what the hell?”

Bucky shrugged. “I saw an opportunity.” He leaned in closer to her, just a little. “It _is_ our anniversary, after all.”

Darcy felt tears prick her eyes and she blinked a few times to send them back where they came from. “Bucky,” she whispered.

“You do know that pulling a fire alarm without cause is a felony, don’t you, Barnes?” Sharon asked, smiling.

“Only for repeat offenders, or if the first offense causes injury or property damage,” Bucky retorted. “Besides, Darcy was about to die of boredom.”

“I really was,” Darcy agreed.

Bucky lifted one shoulder in a helpless shrug. “And then I would have to reign down fire on anyone who had ever wronged her, starting with the instructor who caused her untimely demise.”

“He really would,” Darcy nodded.

Sharon’s smile grew. “You two deserve each other.”

“Why isn’t the fire alarm blaring on this side of the glass?” Steve asked, looking around the corridor. 

“The defenses taught in the annual cyber security training don’t really apply when you can just sweet talk the AI that runs the building,” Bucky replied. 

_“Flirt,”_ FRIDAY accused. Bucky winked at the ceiling.

“I’m not even mad,” Darcy said, sounding just a little awed.

Bucky slung an arm around Darcy’s shoulders and pulled her close. “Ready to get out of here?”

“Yes please. I’m starving.” She looked to the others. “Who wants burgers?”

“You buyin’?” Bucky asked, a teasing grin pulling at his lips as he gave Darcy’s shoulder a squeeze.

“Uh no, I’ve seen you people eat. I’m not made of money,” Darcy scoffed. “But I do happen to have access to our dear cyber security instructor’s expense account.”

Steve gave Darcy a knowing look as he held the door open for them. “Dare I ask how?”

“His password? _Is Password._” Darcy shook her head. “Some instructor.”

“Maybe next year you should teach the class, Darcy,” Sharon suggested.

“Now you’re just asking for the world to burn,” Darcy said. “Besides, if I’m teaching the class, how will Bucky get to practice chatting up Tony’s AIs?”

Bucky grinned, completely unrepentant. “It’s probably a good thing for me that you’re not the jealous type.”

“If I have to share, we could do worse,” Darcy shrugged.

“Way more information than I needed,” Steve muttered.

“Definitely,” Sharon agreed. “To burgers?”

Darcy grinned. “To burgers.”


End file.
